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Advocates Christine Thelker © 2020 Dementia Silver Linings

Surprised by my anger

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Yesterday was the first day since the start of this pandemic that I have felt angry, actually it’s the first time in a very very long time, that I’ve felt angry about anything, and it’s spilled over to today.
I’ve felt many things in the last number of years I have had many things come at me that could or perhaps should have caused me to boil over with anger, but I’ve felt frustration, sadness, disappointment, and a whole array of emotions, but the anger that I felt yesterday and today was not something I saw coming, but there it was, and here it is.
I was going to write about it last night, decided I needed to really think about where and what was driving anger that has left me very unsettled because this kind of anger is not my norm. Many times today I started to write and then stopped. I finally feel able to write about the anger and the thing that really triggered it.


I’ve always tried to honour and respect other’s opinions and believe we all have the right to our views. But there are times when it can and does sometimes more harm than good.

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Sometimes it does actually waste a lot of good energy on something that has no positive impact.
That’s where the anger came from, people wasting good energy, on something that serves no purpose. Other than to make them feel good I guess at expressing their right to free speech. But it angers me that they don’t stop to think about the hurt they may be causing others. Sometimes we should exercise our right to free speech, if it will bring something good, something positive to happen.

Conspiracy theories, refusal to wear masks ( which may be an inconvenience, but that’s all it is), people protesting encouraging others to not follow the guidelines set our by our top health personal. Does not generate anything positive.

I wonder if they give any thought to how that makes those who have already suffered the losses of a loved one to this pandemic, or the thousands and thousands of people suffering the “ long Haul”symptoms wondering if they will ever be well enough to resume there lives. Have we become a society that the “me and I” that we give not thought to how our actions impact others.
I wonder if people understand that yes there is a concern, if they don’t want to believe the health officials, or our government personnel, then perhaps they should figure out how to do true legitimate research, to where the science is right there, the scientists know.
The doctors who are working in hospitals that are at or near capacity know, maybe it hasn’t impacted those people who are shouting out about conspiracy or how we shouldn’t listen or follow the rules. Maybe it hasn’t impacted them yet.

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But when it comes knocking are you going to forgo your loved one being treated because after all you don’t believe you should have to take it seriously or follow the rules, should we be asking those who don’t want to follow the rules to provide their information so that we can put them to the bottom of the list should they need treatment and give it first to those who having been doing what they can to help protect not only themselves and their families but others as well. I wonder how they would feel then.
You see for me it isn’t about me, I can and will do what I can to take care of myself, but I do care about others, I care how it makes someone who may be trying to manage and cope, while their loved lays in a hospital on a ventilator fighting for their life.
Maybe all those people who think it’s not that bad should be rounded up to donate all that energy to helping in care homes and hospitals, maybe if they see first hand they might think before wasting their energy and time on something that is of zero value in the bigger picture.
people are worried about their jobs, about businesses closing we all are, but if we first don’t all do our part, those things will all be effected anyways, people will be to sick to work or shop, or anything, yet we have the ability to do something by all doing our part, so why aren’t we?
My anger is gone know, displaced by a deep sadness over what I see, there is still much good in this world and I’ll pray that good wins, because at the moment that’s all I have. By the Grace of God go I.

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By Chrissy's Journey

I am an advocate for people with dementia in Canada and globally, having been diagnosed with younger onset dementia myself a few years ago.

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