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Advocates Advocating Christine Thelker © 2020 Dementia For This I Am Grateful Living well with Dementia Silver Linings

Necessary but Unwanted Conversations

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This morning I am sitting here waiting for my Doctor to call. I called his office earlier asking for an appointment, and I always feel so fortunate that he usually makes time for me so my wait is seldom more than a day or two at best, but most often the same day. I do understand how blessed I am to have that with my doctor.

But today I am having a conversation with him that I have put off for far too long. Partly this has happened because I forget when I am in my appointment and if I haven’t written it down it doesn’t get talked about, and secondly I think I have been trying to deal with it on my own, but I realize know that I am no longer able to. This is another piece of Dementia that people too often understand or know about, and with Vascular Dementia many don’t understand that it is very common part of Vascular Dementia. I am talking about issues with incontinence. Seems funny doesn’t one would wonder how and why that is such a common issue with vascular Dementia, but our brains are the control centre for all and when there is not adequate blood flow and Oxygen to the Organs it effects things like muscle control, which is needed to have proper control of body functions, all body functions. Every one thinks it’s just memory, it is so so much more and often so much of it we don’t talk about.

This is not a conversation I want to have know or ever, but the reality is it is effecting my quality of life so I can no longer put it off. Exercise and all the things I try to do to help make the incontinence less prevalent and did work for a time and at times I got total reprieve from the effects, although those periods of time are all but gone and those things I do have now stopped working so I need to bring my doctor into the fold. I don’t want medication, not sure if there is anything else we can do, but I will have the discussion, because my quality of life is more important to me than anything else, and I sup0se if medication can help with that then I will look at it. I like to have all the options then make a decision.

At 62 years old these are not conversations we like to have, not with our doctors not with anyone. Most people are too upset and self conscious to discuss these things, they can erode our self confidence, our sense of how we see ourselves, but these are the real parts and pieces of Dementia, and they do impact a persons quality of life and we need to talk about those things, no matter how uncomfortable they may be. I am having many issues with muscles throughout my body, it’s why I am trying so hard with exercise and bike riding walking ect. I am trying to keep the blood flow as best I can, living with Dementia is hard work and getting harder all time. But I am grateful that my doctor listens and does everything he can to try to help me with my quest to maintain my quality of life.

So I’m sure he will do some homework after our chat and then help me come to some decisions on treatment and managing this piece, another indicator that although we look fine, changes are often happening that others don’t see.

I hope you all enjoy your day, I’m off to give my Fig plant an shower while I await the Doctors call.

By Chrissy's Journey

I am an advocate for people with dementia in Canada and globally, having been diagnosed with younger onset dementia myself a few years ago.

One reply on “Necessary but Unwanted Conversations”

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