Advocates Advocating Christine Thelker © 2020 Dementia Event For This I Am Grateful Good Grief Living well with Dementia Silver Linings Stress

Falling Out of Our Lives

Its a beautiful day, this first day of May, 2022 is Marching on it seems in quick fashion. Last week I had the loveliest birthday week I have ever had or that I remember anyways. It was all the very unexpected things and people who made it so special for me. . I am however still in recover mode from my last TIA’s, pretty much recovered but some lingering head pains, and tiring more quickly. It seems after each one it takes longer to recoup and that I tire a little quicker. So being mindful not to overtire my brain and body, in hopes maybe in time I will get a little of the ability to sustain for a little longer. So as May unfolds, I hope we all breathe, we have made it to another month.

So I wanted to talk about this piece I am quoting here “during this time is that many people seemed to just be” “falling out of their lives.”

This was sent to me on Friday as part of a fuller message and conversation. , it resonated so deeply with me as over the course of a week I had so many conversations with people who were feeling of out touch with themselves but didn’t know how to describe it. So this “falling out of our lives” really summed it up for me. We have been living with the pandemic for more than two years, then a war and the fear of world war three starting, unsure of our supply chain, food chain. Everyone I have spoke to talks of being more tired than usual, as they try to find a new normal, as they try to navigate in what feels like unfamiliar world.

What we need to remember that it is an unfamiliar world for everyone right know, so yes we are falling out of our lives, our lives are not what they were, they will not be the same, we will evolve into some new form of a life. Right know though we are surrounded by uncertainty, its like walking blind folded and not knowing what or where your next step will place you. It feels like the whole world needs a break, which seems strange considering the last two years, but many are zoomed out, meeting out, many just need to be able to say today I can’t manage this, today I just need to go for a walk, or run, or drive, or whatever makes your heart happy, this is true for most regardless of if you have dementia other health challenges, or you are perfectly healthy. We grew accustomed to a world where we could have whatever we wanted whenever e wanted, where we could do whatever we wanted whenever we wanted. Life is and was turned upside down, I never thought I would live to see our seniors becoming homeless, the working poor living in shelters, never did I think I would see so many people be angry, I see so much anger out there, because people have not faced times like this before, except for our seniors, who survived, pandemics, wars, depressions, they know how to get through it, they know anger is not the way forward.

I know for me it has become increasingly important that I focus on life, on living, doing things that feel like I am making a difference however small, not only in the dementia realm, but in the realm of life here right now where I am. So I worked over the last few weeks and yesterday four of the ladies from my building went to the nursery, ( where I used to work), I guided them through we made a list, on Wed. we will be going to pick up the pots, plants, and supplies to create a spectacular little garden area, where we can all enjoy fresh veggies throughout the summer, it will create a little socialization, along with healthy eating habits and will make us all feel we are part of something positive. My building is small only 10 units but for the last two years we have all been isolated even from each other, everyone is so looking forward to this little venture, that doesn’t require a lot of work of anyone but has so many benefits and the safety of being ”home”, which is funny as it seems, when we are all just having restrictions lifted, where most people feel they want to be. The world does not feel that safe to many, there is too much uncertainty, but finding a way to bridge the gaps to help each other through, is the way forward, it feels so much better than spending time being angry. We in the dementia community have long been helping each other through, I am taking the gift of what I have learnt and applying it to my broader community. My soul needs it, my heart needs it, taking small steps, being gentle, being kind, opening up that kindness to others. I want to treasure each precious day.

So I hope has you walk into May you do it with gentleness, with kindness, and savour each step along the way. Thank you to all for all that you bring to my life and I hope May finds you all finding ways to navigate through these turbulent times.

By WWW.Chrissy's

I am an advocate for people with dementia in Canada and globally, having been diagnosed with younger onset dementia myself a few years ago.

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