Category: Silver Linings

This beautiful Saturday Morning, the sun is shining as spring approaches ever closer. Somehow this morning as I sat to sip my first coffee it or I seemed to be much more aware of how wonderful it tasted. Maybe it is in part because I feel so very centred, I watched the updates on Putins invasion of Ukraine. I put my Casting Crowns Music on and took myself to that place deep within, staying centred is so important to me at this time, it should be all the time, but like everyone else we get busy with the things that are important to us and in our business we forget to stay centred. It’s easy to do, it’s not wrong, it’s just something that happens. But this morning and all this week really, being centred has been at the top of my list, being grounded in what is really important. This song by the casting Crowns, reminds me of all the lives being lost needlessly in Ukraine, hoping that the people of Ukraine can someone find peace again, that soon the horrors facing them will be over.

Listening to this music helps bring me to my centre. It reminds me to think about how much I have to be grateful for, I can go to bed each night with no worry of bombs raining down on me, I have food in my cupboards, I can go walk about each day freely, without worrying about bombs falling from the sky.

I am hearing people complaining about the price of gas, the price of food, the price of everything on the rise and now on the rise more because of Putins actions. One man, along with his inner circle, creating havoc world wide. People need to complain I guess, it’s human nature. But we all need to take a step back and understand until Putin is stopped, all of the ways it effects us will only grow. We live in a time when the world is connected, that what happens anywhere effects everywhere. And although, it is in our nature to want to place blame and complain, we need to be mindful, and perhaps give ourselves a pinch and remember, that yes maybe we have to alter how we do and what we do, but we are not starving, we don’t have bombs dropping, we are not fleeing the horrors of war. Its ironic that we complain about our governments what they are doing, what we think they should be doing, but then when something like the invasion of Ukraine happens we want that same government to fix everything so we are not inconvenienced, so we can go about doing what we want to do. But what is happening right know is going to inconvenience us, it is going to be tough for the coming time.

We must all understand that we must all work together to stop this man and his reign of terror. This man cares not about his own people, he cares not about you or me, he cares about power, he is dangerous, I struggle to understand how he has been allowed to continue being in power. I am convinced he will not stop at Ukraine, he will and does want all of Europe, this is just the start unless he is stopped. I do not like violence, but sometimes there is a struggle between Good and Evil, and I believe this is one of those times, and I hope Good can prevail. Before we end up in another Great Depression, before we end up in world war 111, I have heard it said that it can’t happen, I don’t believe that to be true, it feels like we are at a tipping point.

These are just all my own thoughts, not all will be aligned with my thoughts and thats ok, I own them, they are mine, I stand by them. I pray, I cry, just like everyone else, and then I remind myself to be grateful. To centre myself, to be supportive in any and all ways I can to all those who are so deeply effected. I don’t have much, I have had to deal with many losses, give up and readjust my life, many times since I received my diagnosis of dementia, but I am fully and acutely aware of how fortunate I still am. If I had a way fo getting someone here to safety, I would happily give up my bed for them, feed them. My family survived Hitler’s reign of terror they came here and build and gave us a life that I am grateful for, so I understand that saying it can’t happen, is not what history teaches us. I am a realist, I don’t run and hide from things, I acknowledge them, I can talk about them, I can admit to my own fears about them. I work hard to stay grounded, to be aware, do to whatever small part I can and I pray. I know many don’t want to have to talk about it, or how its effecting them, but talking and sharing things is a wonderful way to help each other through difficult times, so support each other, and to remind each other its ok to look for and find the laughter and the joy in little things. I am hoping for brighter days ahead, and, hoping we can all dance in the streets and rejoice that this invasion has ended and the people of Ukraine can be home and safe once again and the healing and rebuilding can begin. I hope when that day comes the whole world plans a day of celebration. I hope as you go about your weekend, you keep a good perspective, walk instead of drive if you can, stretch the meals, help your neighbours. Sending much love to everyone everywhere. It’s time for my morning walk, to remember how grateful I am to be able to do something so seemingly simple.

Heres a little history:

The Great Depression was a severe worldwide economic depression that took place mostly during the 1930s, beginning in the United States. The timing of the Great Depression varied around the world; in most countries, it started in 1929 and lasted until the late 1930s.

The Depression affected virtually every country of the world. However, the dates and magnitude of the downturn varied substantially across countries. Great Britain struggled with low growth and recession during most of the second half of the 1920s. The country did not slip into severe depression, however, until early 1930, and its peak-to-trough decline in industrial production was roughly one-third that of the United States. France also experienced a relatively short downturn in the early 1930s. The French recovery in 1932 and 1933, however, was short-lived. French industrial production and prices both fell substantially between 1933 and 1936. Germany’s economy slipped into a downturn early in 1928 and then stabilized before turning down again in the third quarter of 1929. The decline in German industrial production was roughly equal to that in the United States. A number of countries in Latin America fell into depression in late 1928 and early 1929, slightly before the U.S. decline in output. While some less-developed countries experienced severe depressions, others, such as Argentina and Brazil, experienced comparatively mild downturns. Japan also experienced a mild depression, which began relatively late and ended relatively early.

There is much we can learn from history, here is just a few dates:

World War II Major Events Timeline

• November 11, 1918. World War I Ends. …
• January 30, 1933. Hitler Appointed German Leader. …
• September 1, 1939. World War II Begins. …
• September 17, 1939. Soviet Union Invades Poland. …
• September 27, 1939. Warsaw Captured. …
• December 13, 1939. UK Wins War’s First Sea Battle. …
• April 8, 1940. …
• May 10, 1940.

History has much to teach us.

It looks and feels ominus outside, misty fog, low light, its typical spring weather, but somehow it doesn’t feel that way. One wonders if perhaps the pandemic was just somehow a lesson for us all, to learn how to manage and teach us coping skills. To be able to manage what is happening at the moment. Prices soaring, many things difficult to find, many things just not available at all right now. The people of Ukraine might be the ones taking the direct impact of Putin’s invasion of their country, something most of us cannot even fathom, but it is impacting everyone around the globe and every day that it goes on we will feel those impacts more. More uncertainty for everyone, uncertain times. Breathe, Breathe just Breathe, take time each day to do self care. Walk, cry, yes crying releases stress, get extra rest. Be more mindful of the stress others may be feeling, offer more patience, more kindness. Find a good source that you feel is reliable to get your information from and get updates, but don’t sit watching it all day. Limit time on social media, mental health is really important during uncertain times.

On other fronts, yesterday was my first attack of pain in 8 weeks, thoracic region, so severe I couldn’t move, this after the night before having some type of brain event, very likely a TIA. I was in bed early, which I haven’t had to do for many weeks. I decided not to ignore it and listen to it, and rest, today I woke up feeling great again and some residual discomfort but not pain. As soon as I finish writing this I’m going to be turning up the music and do my dancing which I did not do yesterday because of the pain. I have to think it was just a blip a reminder to make the most out of this gift I have received back in January, finding the joy, even when things around us are upside down. Even when our world is turned inside out, finding the joy.

I’m working on some very specific projects right now as far as my advocacy work goes and thats enough at the present time, because for a number of years my advocacy work took up all my time, every day, all day, and advocating is important, but remembering to live is important too. Often we get so wrapped up in what we working on that we forgot to put just as much time into enjoying our days, putting pressure on ourselves to do more, when in fact we should be effort into slowing things down, taking in all that is around us. Taking time to have enjoy a cup of tea or coffee, listen to the birds sing, the rustling of the leaves in the trees, lapping of water up against the shoreline. Remembering that the work will happen, without us pushing ourselves beyond what is healthy amounts of time and energy, recharging takes time too, and the longer we go without recharging the longer it takes to recover and rebalance. Never has that been more important than now when we are living in such uncertain times. For most of us, our parents or grandparents lived through war and depressions, we have had years of little hardships in comparison to what they endured, but it appears the last two years was just a test. I pray daily that this invasion will end, I fear it’s just the beginning, I look to the past for guidance, and pray for the future.

My musics on, its time to dance, then pull out the umbrella and go for a walk and count my blessings for they are many, and I want to be mindful that despite dementia, despite many contributing health factors, I am blessed, I am free, I have much compared to many.

As you go about your day, I hope you can find a reason to smile, laugh and count your blessings.

I was up early this morning, I had a loaf of bread proofing overnight, it needed to go in the oven. My sister in law was going to be here by 9 am to help me work on getting family history stuff done, which has taken on more of an importance at this particular time. Yesterday I had a teary day, I think just a lot of emotions running right now. Understandable, expected for most everyone, two years of a lot of uncertainty, followed by the invasion of the Ukraine, by Putin. I don’t say by Russia, because the people in Russia are rallying against it, they are paying the price for a man whose need for power trumps anything and everything. It’s creating a new level of stress for people, and I am sure its what created this urgency for me to get these records put into the family history site, most records especially from those who were from Germany where destroyed so the fact that my grandmother, Uncle and mother were able to keep them hid away and safe tells me they must be preserved. Dating back to the 1800’s, it felt good to get the information inputted and knowing I had done my part to preserve their history.
I have been feeling physically really well limiting time on social media/ news etc. Ensuring I keep my mental health in check, but then this afternoon out of nowhere, I found myself standing in the middle of the room, no idea how long for, no idea what I was doing or going to do. I have felt off the rest of the day, wondering a small TIA, nothing that requires medical interventions, just a brain thing, first one since the beginning of January. Maybe I am feeling the stress of all that is going on and been pushing beyond what i should be. I feel fine, just a blip, physically feeling great, so because everything for me is vascular based, just a blip, maybe I needed that reminder.
I have also been thinking a lot ….. update, had to leave this last night, needed to sleep, another indication of the blip, but this morning I am feeling refreshed, and hoping it was indeed just a blip. So back to those other thoughts, thinking a lot about how for many if there was help, resources and rehabilitation, In those I include things like programs, music, art, dance, walking, hiking, biking, baking, cooking, the list goes on, along with the more traditional rehabilitions, physiotherapy, etc. Accessibility to these types of programs, enhance quality of life. The constant focus on ”memory loss”, I cant believe after all the years of advocating, we are still there, no wonder the stigma remains. And why is that, is it because it has become the comfortable place for people when it comes to dementia..? Well I for one am tired of people being comfortable with the old outdated views. Vision problems, speech, gait, pain, fatigue, just to name a few. I hate trying to trying to justify my illness, every dementia has its own complexities, its as individualized as we are. The brain the most complex organ, so when a disability stems from this very complex organ we need to somehow and someway get the focus to shift away from just the memory component and focus more on all the other aspects that effect those living with dementia. For many living with dementia, what effects that we feel today and affect us may not be the same ones that effect us tomorrow. We are flexible and adaptable out of necessity, we need others to be flexible with us. Some days I don’t want to do dementia, some days I just want to do life. I have to live with my dementia every day, but I don’t want it to be all that my life is. My advocacy work is deeply important to me, makinf a difference is deeply important to me, but living, living is equally important to me, doing things I enjoy, laughing, crying, taking in all that I can while I can. Its a struggle so often, to give myself permission to put the dementia banner away for a spell and wave the living life flag. Today, as my heart breaks for the people of Ukraine, its a stark reminder that despite whatever challenges I face I need to remember to live today fully.

We are I think, at least many of us, feeling vulnerable, emotional, sad, scared, unsure of anything. We are still coming out of a pandemic, which has turned us inside out, never knowing when or if the next wave was coming, being isolated, trying to be safe, to keep others safe. People have had a hard time emotionally and mentally trying to manage it. just as we were feeling like we were slowly getting our feet under us, and then last night Russia attacked the Ukraine we are outraged, sad, scared, we know what this could mean, this is the closest to a third world war starting that we have ever seen. It is a normal response to living with more uncertainty.

Finding ways to deal with the stress that often we don’t think are even impacting us. We are more apt to have less patience and tolerance of others. We may be more tired, feeling teary and emotional or sad.

These are all normal reactions to unusual events, but it doesn’t give us free rain to act in ways that cause more stress or anxiety for others. We must all try to offer extra space, extra kindness and extend grace to one another. We all have to learn how to destress in times like these, go for a walk, practice deep breathing, gardening, anything that allows your body and brain to stand down.

I many think that the war doesn’t really effect them because its on the other side of the world, but its implications and effects can and do effect many right here at home, many still have family and friends there, lives are impacted, sometimes directly and sometimes indirectly, war effects us all. A point in fact is my own family, here you will see documents of which I have many, my family, for so many all these documents were destroyed during the second world war, I am fortunate to have so many of ours, but did the war impact me, not directly but indirectly yes, the effects of living in Germany during the war left deep scars on many of my family members, my mother included, I never had the chance to meet or know my grandfather, two of my Uncles, one of which had a huge impact on my life were prisoners of war, released in 1945 and 1947, they forged new lives here in Canada, as did my mother and grandmother.

I’m showing all this in hopes that we can all remember, we will cross paths with many as we go about our days, who, you many not even now how this crisis is impacting them, remember they may be having an emotional response that they would not normally have because of abnormal things impacting them.

We all need to extend kindness, and I know people are sick of hearing that, but in all honesty, the last couple years, it’s the kindness that has enabled me to get through this pandemic and it will be kindness that helps me navigate whats coming. So please lets extend that extra bit of understanding, lets not take it personal if someone is reacting in ways we think they shouldn’t be, kindness and understanding may be the one thing that helps them.

Give people permission to talk about it, over understanding, people aren’t always looking for answers or to be told they are right or wrong, they just need someone to understand how they feel.

My heart is heavy.

The protests here in Canada, “The Freedom Rally”, was, in my opinion. not about fighting for our Freedom. We never had our freedoms taken away. We were not dragged from our homes and forced to take a vaccine, we were asked and given the choice. We have a public health crisis, we have been asked to protect ourselves, our families and our communities. We had the right to refuse, we were not arrested if we didn’t. We had safety measures put into place to wear masks. Again we didn’t have to but for the greater good we were asked to. Other health measures were put into place, again for the greater good. If we didn’t want to comply we didn’t have to. We had the freedom to choose, but we were obligated to live with the choices we made.  It meant those who CHOSE to not comply could not access certain businesses, stores, restaurants or countries to protect the many from the few. We were asked to live with the consequences of our decisions. Freedom does not mean we can do anything we want any time we want. This infringes on other people’s freedom. We live in a civilized country where we have laws in place that allows us ALL to have a maximum of freedom for everyone. 

Any protest that contains firearms and ammunition is not a peaceful protest. A peaceful protest does not block highways and prevent people from going about their business. It does not set up semi trucks, travel trailers, hot tubs and businesses in the middle of the street. If rival invasions happened in the neighbourhoods of the Freedom Rally occupiers and blocked them from their homes and streets, would they want something done? Protests should not break laws. They should park in legal places and march to a legal venue and sit or stand in a legal area. Illegally shutting down highways and borders is taking away the rights and freedoms of many others. You can’t fight for something and take it away at the same time and expect the larger part of the population to support you. Putting children front and centre was irresponsible. The people in this country have made many sacrifices over the last two years; we all have had to make choices and live according to the choices we make. Each province and territory has managed the pandemic in the way it deemed best for the majority of its people. A rally that began as a fight for a freedom that was never lost, seems useless.  The rally instead cost the economy millions, not to mention the millions it will cost to clean up the mess they left behind.   You weren’t fighting for my freedom,  you were fighting to avoid the consequences of choices you freely made. Sorry, no support from this girl. 

I don’t care if you believe in vaccines or not, I don’t care if you get vaccinated or not, you live with the choices you make and don’t cry foul when it inconveniences you. Your actions show a sense of entitlement, arrogance, and lack of compassion for your fellow citizens. The irony of waving the flag.

The final piece of this for me is your idea of overthrowing the government. The people of this country voted for our leaders, if you don’t like it, be patient and get out and vote for someone else at the next election. Better yet, why don’t you run for public office, get involved on local or provincial levels where you can affect real policy change. And if you want to protest, do it in a way that does not fly in the very face of what you say you are protesting. I hope we can all get back to loving one another, being kind and compassionate.

So many thoughts rattling around all night long, so today I am writing a mish – mash of it. We are already heading into the last week of another month, lighting speed, I’m still trying to figure out what the year will look like for me and if I don’t soon, it will be gone before I’ve had the chance, and thats ok, I don’t mind just drifting and letting things unfold, sometimes giving things room to come into our life or leave brings about some very special life moments, so I’m just going to drift for awhile and see what comes.

We have seen a very beautiful February weather wise, normally February is the month I struggle the most with, but this year it has been extremely kind, lots of sunshine, even today it says its going to snow, but instead mother nature is providing beautiful sunshine. I have just returned from a lovely walk. Had a lovely chat with a gentleman who was so happy that the month has been so kind and allowed him lots of days to be out enjoying his short walks, he reminded me that we need to be grateful for what we can do, whatever our abilities are today. It is the thing I have enjoyed most since my new found ability to be out of bed, and not be so fatigued is the conversations found along the way. My daily walks, offering me the opportunity to meet folks I otherwise wouldn’t, the ability to enjoy the interaction, seeing peoples smiles.

Sometimes it’s so easy to get wrapped up in whats going on in and around us that we forget to remember the very good and basics that we have, that many others do not. This puts undo stress on us, creates hardships that shouldn’t be there. So today I made the decision to take a break from Facebook, yes my blog will still go out on my facebook page, and people are of course allowed to share it if they wish, but other that that I am taking a break from my personal page and Facebook in general.

There is much unrest within our own country, and globally, and I have been watching friendships disintegrate, its all very sad to me and I don’t want to be part of it. People seem to have trouble respecting someones opinion if it is not in line with their’s, and the inability to do that is causing great damage, and the best way to not get caught up in it is to walk away from it. Having discussions about differing opinions are actually a good thing as long as it is respectful and not trying to dis-qualify someones opinion if it doesn’t fit with yours. There seems to be a lot of anger and I think some of it stems from people being unable to manage their mental health in difficult times. Sometimes you have to draw a line, so I have drawn that line for the next while.

I am hopeful spring will allow the warmth of the air and sun on peoples faces to give everyone a chance to just breathe, to let the anger and hatred go. In the meantime I will look after my well being, I will enjoy all that I have to be grateful for.

We often talk about the vital role that others living with dementia play in our lives, they understand us on a level that only those who live it can. This is not unlike any other illness, people who have walked through the cancer journey, or the MS. journey are other examples can and are great supports to each other. But we also talked the other day about the importance of the importance of our non dementia friends and how vital they are to us. I do believe it’s true and that having a mixed group helps keep us balanced and not swallowed up by one or the other. Living with Dementia is hard work, it can be draining, having our non dementia friends lets us put our focus on something else for a time. Both are uplifting and I am grateful for all that I have in those friendships and connections, sometimes not easy for them to be in my world, sometimes not easy for me to be in theirs but we are all willing and my life is rich because of them.

I’m spending a lot of time listening to music and doing and trying different types of crafts, today I’m going to be trying water doodling, which was a gift from a dear friend, and doodling seems like a relaxing thing to do. So stay tuned for pictures of the trial of water doodling. My second book is nearing completion, I am not rushing it, I will know when it’s complete.

Unrest everywhere you look and yet here I am happy and content thankful for each day I am given. I like how simple my life has become since my dementia, the simplicity feels good, there was a time that I felt somehow cheated out of so much, because my career ended, financially I took a huge hit, so much is very hard at times, depending on how my body is behaving, but I have learnt to go with those things and times, and just look for the simplest joys and I find I am very much at peace with it all. In some ways it has given me many gifts that I would not otherwise have and inner peace is one of the biggest. I don’t have to fight and strive for more, I can just enjoy the day, having the ability to just laugh and be silly something I am truly grateful for that right now. Whether something gets done today or not no longer matters, as long as I am doing something that makes me happy.

Soon Spring will be here and I will be able to get my happy hippee shorts out, maybe I will create another pair or add more colour to the ones I have already created, they make me happy. I hope you can all find the things and do the things that make you happy. Happiness is there for us all despite all, we just have to reach for it. Life is hard it picks us up and slams us down, it gives and it takes, but we all have to decide whether we let it swallow us up or find inner happiness and peace.

Its been a busy week by all accounts, considering two months ago I was barely able to be out of bed, but the business was not at any kind of pace I would have done even just a couple years ago. Physically 6 1/2 weeks, since my Moderna injection, how my immune system operates within my body better than has helped me feel better than anything I can remember , and I am still holding strong. To be without pain, to be without all the inflammation allows me to do much that has been on hold or cancelled for a long time now.

It has also given me the ability to be more aware of the things that I am and how much I am being effected cognitively. My moments that I call squirrel moments are more prominent., staying oriented to day and time is near impossible, without all the reminders i have coming in at a steadily all day everyday, I would never get anywhere on a day or time I am meant to, none of those things are really important, because the tools are there to navigate them. It can and does cause me quite a bit of reasons to laugh at myself. Starting something, getting distracted by something else, changing gears from this to that and back again. Again its just things that I hadn’t really noticed or taken stock of for a while in part, because I was just in survival mode, from all the physical illness, so now I am taking stock and some days I spend a lot of time squirrelling. It’s very evident that not having brain fog for the last six weeks has also contributed to my ability to notice these things. So thats the update on how that piece is going.

Can’t believe that we’ve arrived at another Saturday, time really does seem to be moving faster than I am. Yesterday saw my second time dipping my toes out into the world, I went for my first official hair cut in over two years, Ive been chopping and hacking away at my own since the start of the pandemic. while the hairdresser, new to me, was deciding how and what would be best to do, she asked how I managed to cut the back, I cringed thinking oh no, I can only imagine what shes thinking looking at it. So I showed her, she said well she could never imagine doing it herself but that I had actually done a pretty good job. when she got to the top and sides,I said I’m sorry that you have to deal with this mess, she said well actually I was just thinking that you did a pretty good job texturing. Oh my I burst into laughter and said oh thats great I had no idea I had textured it, i was just doing what i deemed a cut and hack. So my hair is all trimmed up so that it can eventually be a style she has in mind.

The tiptoeing out into the world is something I think many of us are doing cautiously, and we should all do it in ways that are comfortable for ourselves, and we should not judge others as our levels of comfort are all different. There are some things I am still not comfortable with but at least I am stepping out bit by bit and finding my comfort levels.

So now that Ive squirrelled another morning away, time to get up and dance. Enjoy your weekend, find the joy, despite the obstacles, enjoy where you are and who you are in this moment, for this moment truly is all we know we have.

Yesterday was my first in person presentation in over two years. Everything has been on line, and the on line component has worked, but it was always somehow felt like it lost impact, fell short, fell flat, not really sure how to explain it. There has been many excellent webinars, zoom meetings can be very productive, support groups via zoom can and do offer so much, so I am not wanting to say that on line things aren’t or cant have a positive impact, they most certainly do. Somehow conferences on line seemed like the impacts of those presenting was lost. There was no way to interact or connect with the presenters, no ability to have a discussion, the face to face connections., watching and seeing body language.

At the same time we have to be grateful that we live in a time that technology allowed us to do so much on line, to stay connected, but I think for many of us we are just really feeling like we want that face to face connection.

So yesterday, my first in person presentation, of course limited numbers, vaccine passports and masks, no one minded, no one cared, those pieces meant we could all feel good about interacting. I had said that I was hoping to change it up, instead of just presenting and speaking to make it more interactive, engaging. I also know that sometimes people sit back at don’t want to be the first to ask a question, so during my first few minutes, I posed a couple questions to them. It was a terrific way to get people engaged, and engage they did, my talking notes covered nine pages to fill the 30 minutes, the 30 minutes ended up almost a full hour.

My nine pages of notes, never got past the second page, although I believe by the end we covered more than just my notes, and most importantly, people got to ask about the things that were important to them. It was such a wonderful experience, it renewed me, left me very inspired, reminded me of the importance of actually connecting with people not just talking to them or at them. Giving them space to have their voice heard, so they left feeling like they were actually cared about, that what they felt, what they thought mattered, hopefully it left them empowered and hopeful. It still gives me goose bumps this morning. If I had the ability I would do this community by community.

There is nothing more important than being able to leave and feel like you had a small piece of giving people a sense of hope, that they are not alone, that everything they are feeling is valid. As much as they said I inspired them, I think they were more of an inspiration to me. The level of engagement surprised me, reminded me of how important it is for us to share our experiences and our stories. So today with my heart full, I will be thinking about each and every one of those people, grateful for all they left me with, and hope as you go about your day you can find those things for which make your day rich and full.

Sitting this morning enjoying my morning coffee, my little dog sleeping beside me I’m going over my coming week. Yesterday, I started getting things ready for my presentation in Lake Country, they have asked me to do a 30 minute presentation, which by any standards is a long time for a speech/ presentation. I am changing things up for this talk. There is so many aspects and talking points when talking dementia, often we have one topic we are specifically talking to. Be it Stigma, Technology, Rehabilitations, Living Well, and the list goes on, normally even 15 minutes is a long time to talk when presenting. So this time being given a 30 minute time slot I am changing it up, I will talk to many points, but a very large part of it will be interactive with those present.

I have decided to use the approach instead of doing what we know, time to do things differently. We often talk about how 30 years has not brought the level of change we want and that perhaps we need to do something different instead of running the same old tape so to speak. So this will be my first time changing it up. I am hoping that having direct interaction can have a more positive and lasting effect. Getting people truly engaged, instead of talking and knowing many are only half listening, thinking about other things, maybe engaging with them will allow a greater learning/ understanding dementia environment. I’m looking forward to it, I’m looking forward to it being genuine and authentic. Not being restricted about topics, or just being given a list and having to choose which I might like to talk to allows me to be creative with my presentation, it will be a mixed group, people living with and their partners, care providers, professionals, so engaging them should bring about some great discussions.

There is of course times when speaking engagements require the old tried and true, but it doesn’t mean that we cant also change things up when appropriate. I don’t want to become stale, not in my advocacy work, not in my everyday life.

Even living with Dementia, and even though when I think about it, and how for many with dementia routines are important as are being in familiar settings, it is in part why I still live where I do, I am comfortable here. But it does not mean we can not nor should never try to change things even if seemingly little things, like changing its my walking routes, eating breakfast at lunch and dinner at breakfast. We just have to make room for adjustments and changes, but they are possible, just like travel is still possible.

On that note, I am happy to say I have had two of my abstracts chosen for the Alzheimer’s Disease International Conference in June in London England. It seems surreal because it’s been so long since we have had the opportunity to go to these conferences and to see people we have not seen for a long time and meet new people. So lots of work ahead for that but the basis is done in the abstracts that I submitted.

Well I’ve just returned from a very very long walk, met up with a friend, she said I look totally different, from seeing me before the Christmas holidays, so more evidence of how much and how drastic of a change I am going through. Oh and did I mention, on top of being able to feel my cheek bones, I today noticed I am once again starting to be able to see the dimples when I smile, the little dimples that I had actually forgot I had. So much to be grateful for today, it was a beautiful weekend.

Tomorrow is Valentines Day, for many it is a difficult day because they are alone, it is a day that really for some is nothing more than a smack at them to remind them of that fact. For me, I always think about my husband, who I always received the most beautiful card from and one single long stemmed red rose. We always had a lovely dinner together, usually it involved prawns because we both loved them. So I don’t think a lot about the fact I am alone, I instead focus on being grateful for the memories. However, I do believe that we should treat ourselves, and be enjoy a nice dinner, give ourselves chocolates, or flowers or whatever we chose because loving ourselves is important and honouring that is a good thing. So I have bought myself a little bouquet of Tulips for Valentines Day. Love is Love and I hope whether you are alone, or you are sharing your special day with someone, I hope you remember to spread love throughout the year, not just on Valentines Day, because the world can never have too much love.